7 Habits of Emotionally Intelligent People

Posted by: Jo Banks

Date: 11-04-2014

There are numerous studies that indicate (and it doesn’t take a genius to figure out) that highly emotional intelligent (EI) people perform better not only in their personal relationships, but in all areas of their lives.

Emotional intelligence makes the different between being a mediocre leader and an exceptional one; from living an 'OK' life to an extraordinary one. We can all think of managers we’ve worked with or people we know who have exceptional IQ (intelligence quotient) but very low EI, which makes for conflict, animosity and negativity.

So where are you when it comes to EI? Here are seven habits that emotionally intelligent people regularly display:

  1. They surround themselves with positive people

    As high EI people tend to be of a generally positive nature, they tend to gravitate towards the same (like attracts like). They like to be around individuals who are positive, energetic and optimistic. High EI people tend to dislike being around move Hoovers (individuals who suck all the positivity out of them) complainers and generally negative people.
  2. They focus on the positive

    Instead of concentrating on what’s gone wrong, they focus on the opportunity, how they can make things better and what they can learn from a situation rather than going into Victim mode, “why me?”. They generally ask themselves better questions and focus on what is within their control.
  3. They are able to set boundaries and be assertive when necessary

    In conflict situations, they tend to think before they speak. They may often be seen as pushovers because of they are usually mild mannered (as a result of being in control of their emotions). However, they are able to set boundaries and assert themselves when necessary. They manage their time and know when to say no.
  4. They are forward thinking and let go of the past

    They are too busy thinking about the future than to dwell on the past. They learn from past failures and apply that learning to their future endeavours. They never see failure as permanent or a personal reflection on themselves.
  5. They look for ways to make life more fun, happy and satisfying

    High EI people know what makes them happy and find ways to bring that into every aspect of their lives. They also get great satisfaction from making others happy and fulfilled, it’s not all about them and they will go out of their way to help others.
  6. They choose how to expend their energy wisely

    They tend to move on quickly from conflict and don’t hold grudges. They learn any lessons quickly and move on. That doesn’t mean that they are fools and allow themselves to be mistreated; they move on and forget but don’t forget.
  7. Continually learning and growing towards independence

    They are lifelong learners, constantly growing, evolving, open to new ideas and always willing to learn from others. They are not set in their ways or their modes of thinking, they will change their views if another’s opinion makes better sense than theirs. However, they will always trust their own judgement to make the best decision for themselves.

Emotional Intelligence is so important to our general wellbeing, how we deal with and manage others. Are there any areas above that you could benefit from working on?  If so, contact us for a free, no-obligation chat about how we can help. 


JO's FIRST BOOK: Thoughts Become Things

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